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Match Report: TripleB BBL “MAYHEM”

In case you missed it, here was the premise for Blood Bowl “Mayhem” as originally posted on the Blood Bowl Community page and our TripleB group page (also, please forgive us … no one was able to find their balls ((pun not intended)) so we had to substitute dice for Blood Bowl Balls (((I just ordered some from to THIS never happens AGAIN))) …

Very Happy to say that tonight the TripleB Blood Bowl League is celebrating the End of Season 1 Week 1 with a Special League Meeting to discuss league rules and where the league is going and a Special Match called Blood Bowl Mayhem that borrows from the best and brightest. All coaches in attendance will be able to participate. Each coach will select two players to be randomly teleported onto the pitch (in the hopes of working together) while two Blood Bowl balls will be randomly teleported into the middle of the pitch (thank you Bryan Mitchell for your inspired E.L.F. Ball ideas). The game is over when both balls make their way into the end zone OR there’s only one player left on the pitch. SPPs can be accrued from casualties as well as scoring AND if you’re player is still on his feet when the last ball gets into the end zone, you will be awarded SPPs for that as well. One last thing … the Blood Bowl pitch has been magically enhanced by three things; the pitch has been littered with broken glass and scraps of metal so all armor break rolls are modified by +1, there is a steel cage surrounding the pitch where the fans normally sit so any player pushed into the fans gets the automatic injury roll with a +1 modifier and last but not least, any player who is holding the ball for more than 3 turns … the ball will randomly teleport back onto the pitch as if it were thrown back in from rabid fans. The game only ends when both balls enter the end zone OR there is only one player left. This is ALL going down tonight …. may the best (luckiest) coach WIN!!!


We really weren’t sure how this match was going to pan out but we were all game to try. Two coaches had to bow out in order to play their Week 1 game (Matt’s Big City Cheese Skaven vs. Dave’s Forgotten Fangs Undead team) and while that match raged on (ending in a 1-1 tie), the remaining coaches who were in attendance that night offered up two players from their team to sally forth and do battle on the magically fortified Blood Bowl pitch. We rolled random to see who teleported onto the pitch first, here was the order and the player; Apocalypse Rising (Chaos) selected their Minotaur and a Beast man, Gold Diggers (Dwarves) selected a Blitzer and a Runner, GANKSTA Squad (goblins) selected one of their trolls and star gobbo player R.J. Pottymouth, Emerald Gladiators (High Elves) sent forth their Thrower and Blitzer, Frank’s Lost Ones (Chaos) offered up two beast men of their own and last but not least … the Rockheads (Dwarves) sent in two Dwarven Blitzers (they arrived to the match somewhat late due to a poorly executed teleport spell AKA finishing a game of HeroClix).


The players have been randomly teleported onto the pitch. Let the “Mayhem” begin!!!

Once all of the players were in position, the “Mayhem” was ready to start. Two balls were then randomly teleported into the center of the pitch … one of which found its way into the hands of Aiduin, the Elven Blitzer while RJ Pottymouth almost caught the second ball to appear on the pitch but it caught him by surprise and it bounced away. As Nuffle would have it, all of the chaos players appeared on one side of the pitch while the Gold Diggers both ended up on the other side of the pitch completely.

Apocalypse Rising started the “Mayhem” and gave little or no regard to the balls further down the pitch and instead chose to block/blitz the closest target they could find which happened to be Phaendar the Elven Thrower and Kahn, a beast man belonging to Frank’s Lost Ones. A block and a blitz later and both opponents were down but not out of the match … it would be a few rounds before the “Mayhem” claimed its first casualty.

Unlike Apocalypse, the Gold Digger dwarves decided to go after the ball and the only ones standing in their way was an elf and a goblin which meant NOTHING was standing in their way of getting to the balls and scoring.

With 12 players from 6 different teams on the pitch, it’s no wonder that there was very little team work but at least once or twice, Animosity didn’t stand in the way of someone helping someone else out for the time being in order to assist with a block or forego their tackle zones. It was absolute “Mayhem” afterall!!!

After a few turns and a minor scrum in the middle of the pitch for the balls … one ball went one way and the second ball went the other. Both elves were righting an uphill battle to get ball #1 into the one endzone with Brother War the Minotaur and Grazzt the Beastman standing in their way along with RJ the Goblin and Igonna Brakyrskul the Troll. The elves were fortunate as Apocalypse Rising and The Ganksta Squad turned on either other. Not taking to kindly to RJ assisting Igonna trying to flatten all chances of their victory, Brother War turned around and stomped RJ into the pitch which had been magically enhanced and littered with broke glass and metal. The resilient little gobbo was KO’d and sent from the pitch leaving Igonna to win the match by himself. This was going to be a hard thing to do being “Really Stupid” and having no one to guide him. One of the  last relevant things Igonna did was be the ROCK in the “Rock and a Hard Place” scenario for Grazzt the beast man as he was stuck between the troll and the elves who were desperately trying to be the first to score.


Igonna Brakyrskul of the Ganksta Squad single handedly holds down Aiduin and Phaendar of the Emerald Gladiators in their attempts to put ball #1 into the end zone while Grazzt takes a quick nap and Brother War decides what to do next.

While this battle raged on one end of the pitch, another battle was raging on the other side of the pitch between Dwarves and Chaos. Frank’s Lost Ones was fighting a losing battle for control of ball #2. As Nuffle would have it, the fate of Knife from Frank’s Lost Ones was decided when two more dwarves showed up on the pitch … this time they belonged to the Rockheads. Better late than never was their motto and they came to FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT (and drink beer)!!!

After a few turns of pushing each other around, the Rockheads and the Gold Diggers worked together to crush any chance of Frank’s Lost Ones from getting to the ball to score. While Lagos the Piledriver rushed to pick up the ball, Granite and Breccia from the Rockheads took care of business and stomped Knife into the pitch.

Back to the other side of the pitch, the elves were still trying desperately to score and almost had the opportunity in their hands until NUFFLE struck Aiduin the Elven Blitzer down down down! Dodging in and out of their enemies tackle zones, it all came down to one dodge and Aiduin would have been home free to score. Calling upon all of his innate elven agility, Aiduin leapt from the clutches of Igonna the Troll and managed to scamper away only to be brought down by the pitch itself. It all happened so quickly but Aiduin must have slipped on the debris littering the pitch and face planted right into the field giving up the ball which bounces right into the Steel Cage surrounding the pitch. The ball is then randomly teleported back onto the field giving someone else the possibility of taking ball #1 into the endzone. Seeing the opportunity, it was time to act and Apocalypse Rising was also brought down by Nuffle. Brother War, in an attempt to totally remove Frank’s Lost One’s from the game threw a block on Kahn the beast man and was punished by NUFFLE. Brother War saw nothing but DOUBLE SKULLS as he hit the pitch hard – COMPLETELY STUNNED.


Brother War of Apocalypse Rising throws a block against Kahn the beast man of Frank’s Lost Ones and comes up DOUBLE SKULLS!!!!

Back to the other end of the pitch, The Rockhead Blitzers are now fouling away at Knife from Frank’s Lost Ones in an effort to send him off the pitch (PERMANENTLY)!!! Seizing the opportunity, Lagos the Piledriver is FINALLY able to pick up the ball and stars heading to the end zone while his partner Fenrir the Dwarven Runner stays behind to watch his back and jump on the FOUL-FOR-ALL against Knife.

What happens next brings the “Mayhem” match to a close quite quickly. Down but not out, Apocalypse Rising offered up their prayers to the Gods of Chaos and their prayers were answered. Grazzt the beast man was able to stand up and blitz Aiduin the Elven Blitzer causing a casualty (lucky for Aiduin a top notch Apothocary was standing by to aid in his recovery. Thanks to the Apothocary, any injured players will be able to start the next match in the KO Box rather than a wooden coffin). On the same turn, Brother War was able to control his “Wild Animal” within, stand up and rush/blitz the nearest target that WAS NOT a troll. Brother War had his sights set on DWARVES!!!

The rest of the “Mayhem” match played out in the next two turns and it went like this …

Igonna Brakyrskul the Troll had no one to help him and his “Really Stupid” disability sealed his fate leaving him to stand still and drool until his coach came to collect him after the match. Grazzt dodged away from the troll and Phaendar the remaining elf to go after the ball. One turn later, Grazzt was able to pick up the ball and run it into the end zone thereby becoming the first player to score in this “Mayhem” match. Grazzt had the opportunity to leave the pitch in one piece or come back out for more guts and glory. Grazzt decided to step back onto the pitch but was never able to do anything because a certain Dwarf named Lagos the Piledriver was about to finish the game for good … but not before Brother War blitzed and blocked the Rock Head Dwarves into next week claiming another casualty in the process. While everyone else was too busy to notice or unable to stop him, Lagos the Piledriver ran ball #2 into the end zone thereby ending the TripleB “Mayhem” match for better or worse.

Star Player Points were awarded for the following scoring the touch downs, any casualties inflicted and any passes completed. SPPs were also given out to the players who were literally left standing on their feet when the match came to its end.

All in all, Blood Bowl “Mayhem” was a SMASH and everyone had a great time. For those who were unable to play in this “Mayhem” match, there will be a second match ONLY for those coaches who did not participate in the first one thereby giving EVERYONE in the league the opportunity to earn bonus SPPs and keep in line with the rest of the teams in the league. A day and time will be chosen in the days head.

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Coach James Luft
The "Coach" of is yours truly, James Luft ... formerly of EndZone Magazine (a Blood Bowl publication) and Legions Realm Monthly. I am a Long time gamer who started with D&D back in the mid 80's, loves Blood Bowl, painting miniatures and throwing down on the pitch.